


Confessions and Conversations

by DunmerLover



Series: What Happens in the Fighters' Guild [3]
Category: Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion
Genre: Also post-Oblivion Crisis in one case, Canonical Character Death, Coming Out, Confessions, Conversations, F/M, Fighters Guild, I hate tagging, Modryn is guildmaster, OC and Viranus are best friends, OC is not the Hero of Kvatch, Or will be later, Pre-Oblivion Crisis, Skooma, Slight Canon Divergence, Unrequited Crush
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-06
Updated: 2018-10-21
Packaged: 2019-07-07 19:54:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 8,335
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15915150
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DunmerLover/pseuds/DunmerLover
Summary: A small collection of conversations taking place before the events ofInsufferable(and in one instance betweenInsufferableandWhat I Did for Love) that I felt were relevant enough to share, but don't have a place in the main story.These accompany my larger story about Modryn Oreyn the Guildmaster and his Imperial second-in-command.





	1. Anyone But Her

**Author's Note:**

> My brain refuses to let this story end.
> 
> So let's go back in time! As it says, this is a series of important conversations that took place between Evie and other characters (and other characters between each other) that don't have a place in either story. If you don't know what I'm talking about, this is based on a larger story I wrote and it relies HEAVILY on it. I guess you can probably take it on its own though. I don't know.
> 
> Anyway, let's get started. Chapter 1: the day Evie first arrives in Chorrol.

Evie Cenitus stumbled over her words. Somehow the joke that seemed like such a great ice-breaker at the time came disjointed out of her mouth, half-forgotten in her nerves and, now she thought about it, more than a little off-colour. The orc - Kurz gro-Baroth, that’s what he’d said his name was - stared down at her now less with disinterest on his face, he now positively snarled in annoyance. Evie didn’t need him to say a thing. Already she knew she’d made a terrible first impression.

She had to get out of this conversation. Evie let her pathetic joke fizzle out into nothing - a disastrous end to a truly mortifying attempt at an introduction - and politely excused herself.

“Vilena Donton, you said?” she repeated. “Upstairs? She’ll admit me to the Guild?”

Kurz gro-Baroth grunted. “Maybe.”

Evie smiled a weak and nervous smile. “Thank you, sir.”

The orc wasted no time getting as far away from the Imperial as possible, turning and heading across the foyer and out a back door into the sunlight outside. As he moved, the man previously hidden behind gro-Baroth’s hulking frame came into view. As Evie met his crimson eyes, she wilted.

 _Oh Nine, he’s a handsome one_ , she thought to herself as he continued to glare at her. His strong, masculine features were fixed in a state of sheer surprise, but those eyes still burned right through her. _How old is he?_ she wondered. It was hard to tell with elves, and he didn’t look _young_. As they stood, neither looking away from the other, the man held himself with the air of someone who’d been doing this job a _long_ time. She might’ve angered someone important.

 _Why are you still staring at him, Evie?_ Do _something!_

She moved towards him, her legs weak, a part of her curious to know whether he’d heard all of the exchange. Of course he had… why else would he be glaring at her like that? All she could manage was a quiet, strangled greeting she wasn’t sure the Dunmer even heard, before sidestepping him quickly and heading on up the stairs as fast as possible.

*

Modryn Oreyn watched the young Imperial’s every step as she went, still not entirely convinced any of that exchange had really been more than a figment of his imagination. He scowled to himself. _New recruit?_ he thought. _We’re scraping the bottom of the barrel now, we really are… I wonder how long_ she’ll _last._

With that he followed his comrade out into the yard. He was sure a little sparring would help put her out of his mind. There was no way Vilena would actually _admit_ her, he was sure of it, recalling the size of the girl despite the blade at her hip and the thoroughly-worn shield on her arm. She looked like she’d barely handle the weight of that sword, she’d be no use to the Guild. There was a reason so many of his brothers were orcs - some people were better suited to the work, and others weren’t.

He ignored everyone else out in the open space. Mace in hand, Modryn assumed an appropriate stance and took the first swing into the training dummy, and already he felt his annoyance ebb away. She was certainly attractive, he thought - not that he’d ever been particularly interested in Imperials - and probably meant well by being there. He laid into the mannequin fully and barely a minute later he surfaced, panting heavily, surrounded by the pieces of what remained of it.

Things had been problematic, to put it nicely, since Vitellus died. On top of that, rumours of a rival Guild setting up in Leyawiin weren’t helping.

 _But _she_ won’t be our problem_.

*

*

Oreyn was proved wrong about that the moment he re-entered the Guild hall. The young Imperial descended the stairs and nearly jumped out of her own skin when she met his eyes again - her own were wide and fearful. A dark part of him felt satisfied knowing she was afraid of him, and he was happy to see her leave in a hurry without trying to speak to him again. When the heavy doors closed behind her, the foyer fell silent.

“I see you’ve met Evie,” the warm, motherly voice of his Guildmaster was right behind him.

“You didn’t _recruit_ her, did you?” he asked, not caring to keep the disappointment out of his voice.

“Don’t be so quick to judge her, Modryn. Give her a chance.”

Vilena Donton moved around the tall mer slowly, and took a seat at the round table. She began piling the remains of last night’s potatoes and dried pork on a plate.

Modryn tried to ignore the sinking feeling in his gut. “Fine. What’s her background?”

With her mouth full, Vilena didn’t respond straight away. “Arena,” she said eventually. “A year of it - once she came of age to start fighting. Lifelong training before that. Said she made quite a name for herself.”

“What happened? Why don’t they want her any more?”

“Think positive for a change, Modryn! Positive thoughts! She left of her own accord.”

Modryn took the seat next to her, still scowling. He was quickly running out of reasons to dislike the girl. “You might want to send someone to confirm that.”

The Guildmaster only chuckled. “Give the girl a chance! You’ll have plenty of time for it!”

“What? What does _that_ mean?”

“I’m placing her directly under your experienced wing,” Vilena replied, her pleasant smile persisted despite the way Modryn’s ears drooped in sheer horror.

“Vilena-”

“I won’t hear a word about it,” the Imperial cut him off. “She’s yours to command from here on out. Evie’s experienced enough, yes, but she’ll need someone to show her what it means to fight for a Guild.”

“Anyone else, Vilena,” Modryn pleaded. “ _Anyone_ but her. Don’t make me…”

He trailed off. It was hopeless, he knew, when he saw her stern features as unchanged as her resolve.

“I can’t think of anyone better for the job,” the Guildmaster said, trying to be encouraging as she put a gentle hand to his arm. “Just a little guidance. Who knows? Maybe you’ll warm to her. When you’re done with her perhaps you’ll be the best of friends.”

The Imperial returned her attention to her lunch, and Modryn knew she really wouldn’t hear another word about it. He was utterly defeated, and he didn’t know what to do with that energy, that frustration. Fuming, he stood and climbed the stairs to the office, snatched up a ledger and picked a contract almost at random. It’d take more than a little sparring to work _this_ off.

*

*

The new recruit arrived early - Modryn was glad she was at least punctual, but now as he stared her down he knew those wide eyes would get on his nerves before the day was out. At least she’d had the sense to stay at the tavern overnight and not get in his way.

“Evie Cenitus,” he said, not giving the girl a chance to catch her breath. The door hadn’t even closed behind her before he’d offered his hand to shake. “I’m Modryn Oreyn, Champion of the Fighters’ Guild. It’s fallen onto my shoulders to officially welcome you into our ranks.”

Evie took it, and he could feel her trembling. He’d never known a new recruit to be quite this nervous before. She quickly averted her gaze. He got that a lot, more often than not people didn’t like his eyes but it still lit the fires of anger inside him - she came from the Imperial City, had she never seen a Dunmer before?

“I suppose I should tell you what we’re going to do with you, Associate,” he continued, breaking the awkward silence between them. He sighed quietly, and his ears fell. “Vilena’s made it _my_ job to train you up, and she won’t take no for an answer.”

Modryn felt a dark satisfaction at how hurt the Imperial looked when he said that. It was clear his words had cut her deeply. He didn’t give her time to let that sink in, instead he made for the back door and gestured for her to follow.

“Which means we’ll be working together closely from now on.” He was careful to keep the disdain _in_ his voice as he told her. “You’ll get all your orders from me.”

He held the door open for Evie, and she hurried out into the yard as quick as her feet would take her. When she was out, he followed her onto the veranda. Vilena had been vague about what the girl being ‘his to command’ meant, but he was certain she’d notice if he palmed her off on Azzan. Not that _he’d_ complain. Modryn would never understand why Azzan loved working with new recruits so much.

So, that meant he had a job to do, and they might as well get started. “Vilena tells me you used to fight in the Arena,” he said. He gestured to her sword, and when she didn’t get the hint, grabbed it himself with a frustrated growl, unsheathed it and shoved it into her hand. The girl looked terrified. "We do things a little differently here."

He readied his own weapon. “Let’s see what you can do.”


	2. Don't Tell Anyone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set during _The Master's Son_ quest.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think this one chapter might be my favourite thing I've ever written before.

“I could use some help, Evie!” Viranus Donton called from his position at the far end of the cavern. He tried in vain to pull his blade out from the torso of the troll that now pinned him against the rock wall behind.

Evie Cenitus’ head snapped up quickly, she felled her own target with ease, driving her sword up under the troll’s jaw and into its head. The creature spasmed a little before crumpling on the ground, and Evie pulled out her bow, nocked an arrow and fired. The arrow shot across the cavern and hit its mark - the troll so intent on ripping out her friend’s throat roared again, this time in annoyance at the arrow now embedded in its skull.

Viranus used the distraction to wrench himself free of the troll’s grip. He grabbed the handle of his sword and pulled hard, narrowly dodging a graceless swing of the monster’s fist, and he gave up trying to retrieve it. “That’s _it?_ ” he called out across the room. The troll advanced on him again, snarling and spitting foam from its mouth. “You know Evie, for an Archer you hit like a daisy!”

“Shut UP Viranus!” Evie laughed, but the smile was wiped off her face when the furious troll reached out and grabbed her comrade by the throat. She fired again, and though her arrow was always true as could be, Viranus was right - she still wasn’t much use with a bow. As her shot landed in the troll’s neck it didn’t even flinch at the impact.

Viranus put both hands to his neck to try and pry the creature’s grip away just so he could breathe. “Kind of a bad time to start practicing!” he wheezed, and he was slammed back against the wall. The troll leaned in, inches from his face and roared. Viranus cringed. “Do something!”

Evie bent down and retrieved her blade from the fallen enemy’s brain just in time to whirl around and slice another troll’s head clean off. They really were running out of time, it was now or never. The girl took aim and hurled her sword across the cavern and it quickly hit the mark too - the troll howled in agony, the blade almost cleaving its head in two.

Viranus pushed it away as soon as its grip loosened, and it fell to the floor. Finally, he was able to pull his sword from its stomach and he drove the blade home into the troll’s chest as hard as possible. He met resistance but kept going until the monster fell silent and still. He relaxed, and pulled out the blade. Aside from the panting of the two Imperials bouncing off the walls, the cavern was quiet.

Evie approached her friend with concern, but couldn’t help but laugh at the deep scowl Viranus fixed on her, his face covered in foam.

“Are you okay?” she asked, still grinning widely.

The Guildmaster’s son still held her with that same unimpressed glare. “You could at least _pretend_ you care about the answer,” he said sternly. He fought hard to stay composed but the twitching at the corners of his mouth gave him away.

“I do, I do! Oh, come on… you’re okay, aren’t you? We just need to…”

Evie burst out laughing again as she stole a glance back up. “We just need to get this off of you. I think I’ve got something in here…”

After a few seconds of searching, the girl took a clean cloth from her satchel and handed it to her friend, along with a healing potion. He still tried his hardest to stare daggers as he took them. “Thanks Evie… that’s the first time you’ve done something _useful_ today…” he said derisively.

“Don’t be like that Viranus! I pulled through in the end, didn’t I?”

The man’s features softened as he thought, and wiped the blood and foam off his face and hair. “It really was amazing,” he finally admitted. He knocked back the potion quickly. “Where did you learn to do _that?_ ”

Evie had crossed the cavern again, now it was safe to, and she knelt down to one of the corpses, her smile now positively wicked. “That’s a first for me,” she said. Carefully, she positioned a cheap iron dagger in the troll’s eye socket and popped the organ out as cleanly as she could. “Hey Viranus… I’ve got a gift for you.”

Now significantly cleaner, Viranus cocked his head to the side in interest.

“Here…”

She stood and returned to him, and the older recoiled in horror when Evie tried to force the eye into his hand.

“Evie!” he wailed, batting away her gauntlet. “That’s disgusting! Put that down!”

Evie could hardly breathe for laughing. Viranus might have been a couple of years older than her but he was far less experienced in battle of any kind. As a result, it was only too easy to get under his skin. “What? I thought you might like a _souvenir_ from our first contract together!”

She looked down at the dark eye contemplatively. “You know… alchemists tell you all about troll _fat_ … but troll _eyes_ have some interesting qualities too…”

She looked back up. “I bet they’re tasty. Try it!”

“No! Get that away from me!”

He was lucky enough to dodge the organ Evie tried to press against his face. He kept retreating, but she still advanced. He had no choice left but to run.

Evie followed. “C’mon Viranus!” she called as she chased her fellow Imperial through the twists and turns of the cave. It was so dark she relied on his footfalls to track him. “Eat the eye!”

She was still giggling like a child as she caught up to him in a small cavern, and nearly slammed head-first into his now-still body. The eye dropped from her hand and rolled off somewhere in the dark as she steadied herself.

“Viranus, what…” she trailed off as he gestured with his torch, and she followed to where her friend was staring so fixedly. Her heart sank when she looked upon the bloated body of Galtus Previa.

“I can’t believe it,” Viranus’ deep voice echoed in the limited space. “So much death…”

Evie placed a hand on his shoulder in an attempt to comfort him.

“I… didn’t know him at all well,” he continued.

“Me neither,” she replied. For a moment the two continued to look upon the corpse. Oddly enough, the body seemed to be untouched by the trolls.

“We should leave,” Viranus eventually said. “Report to Modryn… someone will come and give him a proper burial.”

“We can’t leave now,” Evie said. “It was getting dark before we even came in here. If you think trolls are bad you don’t want to know what might be on the road at this time of night… let’s camp here. It’ll be safer in the morning.”

*

*

Neither of the Imperials practiced magic, yet of the two, Viranus was slightly more able. That meant it was his duty to light the fire, and Evie tended to it as Viranus now explored the more expansive room they’d call their home for the night. As Evie threw on more wood, her friend knelt down to a chest across the cavern and opened it up.

“Evie…” he began. His eyes were wide in his surprise. “Look at _this!_ "

“What is it?”

The girl scrambled to her feet and made her way over, coming to kneel beside him as he threw the chest open. As he rifled through the stockpile of small vials they clinked together. He took one at random. They were all the same.

“D’you know what this is?” he asked excitedly, holding it up for her to see in the dim torchlight.

Evie shook her head.

“I think this is Skooma!”

“ _Skooma?_ ”

“Yes, I’m certain of it. I wonder who left it here… there’s so much of it.”

The younger leaned in closer to inspect the inconspicuous liquid. “How do _you_ know this is Skooma?”

Viranus suddenly looked sheepish as his brown eyes met Evie’s cold blue. “I… I tried it once. Don’t tell anyone. _Especially_ not Mother.”

Evie frowned in disbelief. “ _When?_ ” was her only response.

“A couple of years ago-”

“No I mean when did you have the _chance_ to use Skooma without your mother noticing?”

Viranus chuckled. “You assume Mother watches me _that_ closely? That there’s no give at all in the apron strings?”

He stared at the contents of the vial, almost longingly. “I had a little more free reign when Vitellus was alive. There’s a lot Mother doesn’t know…”

Though she’d never actually seen it before, Evie recognised the look on the man’s face. “Well… do what you want with it, but I’m not interested. Modryn would kill me if I came back high on that stuff.”

She did hesitate before asking. “…What’s it like?”

He didn’t look at her. His eyes stayed trained on the swirling liquid in his palm, caressing the cold glass, practically salivating. “I couldn’t begin to describe it.” Despite that admission, he did his best. “It’s… like you’re dreaming. The most wonderful dream. You feel so _good_. You can see everything, you can _do_ anything.”

He sunk deeper into his trance. The ringing silence in the cavern was almost painful, the only sound was the faint drip of water falling from somewhere up above. He spoke so quietly. “I know why people come back for more.”

Neither said anything for a moment, before Viranus suddenly snapped back to his senses. He cast the vial down with the others and slammed the chest shut. “I won’t though,” he said finally, before standing. Evie followed him back to the warmth of the fire.

The older set about laying down his bed roll. “Don’t tell anyone,” he repeated anxiously.

Evie smiled, setting up her own bed roll next to his. They both sat. “Don’t worry Viranus… your secret’s safe with me.”

“Thanks.”

He skewered a piece of dry bacon and held it over the fire to cook. “One embarrassing secret deserves another… don’t you think?” he asked, turning his head to Evie with a mischievous smile.

Evie returned it, and as she picked up her own skewer she thought hard. “I don’t really have any secrets…” she decided. “You already know about the Arena.”

“You can’t think of _anything?_ ”

“Well… there is one thing.”

Viranus shuffled closer to his friend and leaned in.

“You’re not the only one bound by the apron strings,” she began. “I used to get that a lot too… back in the Imperial City… my parents making me live by their strict rules. They wanted an Arena Champion, so they had to try and cultivate one, I guess. So… I do know how it feels.”

She chuckled to herself. “I remember as a child they told me _Molag Bal_ would find me and _steal my innocence_ if I stayed out alone after dark…”

“Molag Bal? That’s a little… heavy, for a child, isn’t it?”

“You want to know what’s worse? I believed that until I was _twenty!_ People worshipped him and he rewarded them - what was I _supposed_ to think?”

The pair laughed together as they checked on the meat.

“So I suppose that’s embarrassing.”

“It’ll do,” Viranus said. He shrugged. “So… if not _Molag Bal_ , who _did_ steal your innocence?”

“No one _stole_ it,” she reminded him. “I offered my innocence.”

“To who?”

“You go first.”

Viranus stiffened. “An Imperial,” he said vaguely.

Evie’s eyebrows raised curiously. “Just that? An Imperial? Anyone I might know?”

He grinned. “You’re getting off-track Evie… you still haven’t told me yours.”

She offered him a flippant look, deciding not to press… just yet. “A friend of mine back at the Arena,” she said. “A Redguard named Sherman. He was certainly handsome - tall… strong… had his hair in cornrows, and he had the _cutest_ little beard…”

She traced a finger across her own lip and chin to demonstrate, a fond smile warming her face as she reminisced. “He was a little older. Trained me to use a shield - they let him back in as a teacher but he was banned from competing.”

“Why?”

“He was talented when he was in there, I know that much. But he had a strange… hobby. He was a necromancer… that’s why he came over here in the first place - couldn’t live in Hammerfell, his own people wouldn’t have it. He didn’t fight with magic but he _did_ like to… how do I put this…”

She scratched at the back of her neck as she thought of the best words. Viranus gave her the time, setting the cooked meat down on a plate and skewering more.

“He was a charismatic guy, and he loved nothing more than getting a crowd going. Putting on a show. Part of that was raising the body of his fallen competitor and making them… dance.”

When she didn’t keep going right away, Viranus urged her on. “What happened?”

“For some reason they allowed this. To a point. His career kept moving forward until one day he got one of those bodies to drop-kick its own head out of the arena. That would’ve been fine… probably… if the kick had been a little stronger and the head hadn’t hit the Chancellor in the face.”

Despite himself, Viranus burst out laughing. Evie smiled too.

“Chancellor was so mad he had Sherman sent to _prison_.” Evie continued. “From what he told me he spent a couple of weeks down in the dungeon before the Emperor _personally_ saw him freed. People say the Emperor heard the story over dinner and found it so comical he couldn’t _stand_ to know the culprit was still imprisoned. He was let out of the dungeon but banned from ever competing again. But that was a long time before I met him.”

“So what happened? Between you and him?”

“Neither of us wanted anything serious,” she replied simply, offering a small shrug of her shoulders as though that was the end of it. “Just a little fun. So what about you and your Imperial? What happened between _you?_ ”

“Nothing _happened_ …”

“You’re still together?”

Viranus nodded.

“C’mon, you have to tell me! Who is she? I won’t tell anyone if you don’t want me to!”

His face was unreadable. “Eduard,” he said simply.

“Eduard?” Evie repeated, the image of their comrade clear in her mind’s eye. “You’re gay?”

Viranus stared thoughtfully into the fire for a moment before answering. “I suppose I am,” he said. “But you can’t tell anyone. Least of all Mother, I’ll tell when I’m ready.”

“People wouldn’t care-”

“Mother expects grandchildren,” Viranus cut her off and the trepidation was clear in his voice. “She’d be awfully disappointed, and she's been through enough lately, what with Vitellus... In fact… she’s always talking about _you_ \- how wonderful it would be if you and _I_ were together.”

He smiled as the realisation hit his friend. Most people already thought the two Imperials were an item, they were so close, but Evie had never stopped to wonder why Vilena Donton had always been so _particularly_ kind to her, and only too happy to see her bond with her remaining son. Suddenly all the times Vilena had invited her over for dinner made perfect sense.

“Of course I won’t,” she said, adding her own cooked bacon to the plate. After stoking the fire a little with the skewer, she took a particularly crispy piece for herself.

“So that’s two secrets of mine…” Viranus began, his smirk growing wider as he again turned to the girl. “You need to tell me something to balance this out. Who do _you_ like? Have a crush on someone?”

“Who says I have my eye on _anyone?_ ”

“Your bright red face,” Viranus replied simply, gesturing, and only laughed when Evie pouted moodily at him, her mouth still full of bacon. “Who is it?”

“I’m not telling! It’s pretty bad.”

“After what I told you, you _owe_ me, Evie!”

Evie stalled for time by stuffing the last of the meat in her mouth, taking her time to chew it.

The man sighed. “If I can guess who he is, will you tell me?”

Reluctantly, Evie nodded her head.

“...Do I get any clues?”

She swallowed. “Three questions. That’s it.”

“Okay…”

Viranus leaned back on his bedroll, settling himself on his elbows, and for a moment he decided. “Does he live in Chorrol?”

“...Mmhm.”

“Is he part of the Guild?”

Evie’s heart pounded in her throat, which was now suddenly dry. She reached for her waterskin. “Yeah.”

“...He is a _he_ , right?”

She swallowed her water. “That counts as a question!”

“Okay, okay. So he’s in Chorrol with us… and he’s one of us.”

He took a piece of meat and didn’t continue until he’d finished it all. “Is it Mattius?”

“No… it’s not Mattius.”

“Huh… how many other Imperials are with us…”

“What makes you think he's an Imperial?” Evie offered. She didn’t know how her face could possibly go redder, but it found a way. “Maybe I prefer men of the… elven variety.”

Viranus’ mouth fell open in shock. “… _Modryn?_ ” he whispered.

The girl lowered her head in shame. “I told you it was bad, didn’t I?”

The older didn’t know whether to laugh, groan, or hug the girl. He scrambled back onto his knees until he faced her again. “Yeah… that is pretty bad. You win.”

He shifted close and threw an arm around her shoulders. “Oh, _Evie_... How did this _happen?_ Are you feeling okay?”

“Shut UP!” Evie cried, grinning despite her humiliation. She shrugged him off. “He’s handsome! You can tell that, right?”

“He is handsome, I suppose... if you're into dark elves. But he’s also a bastard. Seriously, how did this happen?”

“I’ve always liked him… not like it just came over me one day.”

“You could’ve fooled me - I had _no_ idea.”

Suddenly Viranus looked serious. “What are you going to do?”

“You say that like there’s anything I _can_ do.”

“Aside from the obvious…”

“I’m young enough to be his daughter - several times over! He wouldn’t want any of that. Besides, dark elves don’t like Imperials, and Modryn doesn’t like _anyone_.”

“He likes you more than the rest of us.”

“Not in that way.” It had taken months to prove to Modryn that she was an asset to the Guild - and even more to establish something akin to a friendship - and she didn’t feel like ruining that now. “It’s just a stupid little crush,” she continued. “It’ll go away in time, and until then the only thing I can do is pretend it’s not there. It does feel good to get it off my chest for once though.”

Viranus smiled warmly as Evie leaned in for a genuine embrace. “But don’t tell anyone,” she said sternly. “ _Anyone_.”

“I promise, Evie, I won’t. I’ll take it to my grave.”


	3. You Knew

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first half is set at the end of _Trolls of Foresaken Mine_.
> 
> The second half at the start of _The Hist_. This takes some liberties on the course of events in-game - in _Insufferable_ and beyond it's established that Modryn led this mission because _why wouldn't he?_ ~~and plus it would've been so awesome if he was a follower again during that quest~~

Modryn Oreyn paced around his cabin, restless. He’d lost count of the hours he’d shut himself away, just pacing. Despite his exhaustion, sleep had evaded him entirely. And despite his new-found insomnia, he was unable to put his mind to anything except pacing. He’d tried a few times to paint something but even that couldn’t hold his attention. To say he was _anticipating_ Evie Cenitus’ return would be an understatement.

When the cabin door finally creaked open and Evie’s small form entered, blocking out the moonlight, a cold chill ran up his spine. At her robotic movements, slow as she closed the door behind her, and her sullen face, that chill overtook him - already he knew she didn’t bring good news.

“What have you found out?” he pressed, foregoing a greeting of any kind. “What happened to Viranus?”

The Imperial didn’t respond. Instead she took her sweet time rifling through her satchel for something.

Modryn didn’t have the patience to wait for an answer. “Out with it Evie!” he barked.

She jumped at his outburst, but resumed her disinterested slouch. Still saying nothing, still not looking anywhere but his feet, she pulled out a ratty, leather-bound book and pressed it into Modryn’s hand. As he raised it to inspect he recognised it as a journal. On instinct he flicked through to the last filled pages, and when he did he was near paralysed with horror.

“ _Dead?_ ” he yelled. “DEAD? WHAT HAPPENED?”

As he looked back up from the bloodied and smeared pages to the Imperial who still hadn’t said a word he found he didn’t have the heart to keep yelling. Her lip trembled and her face contorted, and Evie promptly burst into tears. She collapsed onto Modryn’s chest, still bawling, and he, taken aback, had no other choice but to hold her as she sobbed. He let the journal fall from his grip and it hit the floor.

He felt uncomfortable as he put his strong arms loosely around her - he wasn’t the best at comforting people, to put it nicely - and they simply stood like that for a while. Modryn surprised himself - he’d expect to reprimand a fighter directly under his command for crying like this. Evie had visibly come close a few times when he’d been particularly hard on her, but she’d always managed to keep it together. Under these circumstances, however, he could only let her do what she must… she and the Guildmaster’s son had been a couple, after all - though they’d never announced it, everyone in Chorrol knew. Aside from Vilena Donton herself, nobody had lost more tonight than Evie.

“Not tonight,” she managed to get out between heavy sobs. Her shoulders heaved as she hung limply around Modryn’s neck. “Yell all you want-- at me-- but not tonight…”

His ears fell as he gave a gentle pet to her back. He didn’t yell at her again. He didn’t say anything. It was a long time before Evie stopped sobbing even a little, and after that she still clung to him, shaking and exhausted, and he didn’t hurry her in moving. When he eventually felt her weight shift on him, Oreyn eased Evie down to sit on the edge of the bed, and he squatted down to retrieve the journal.

He found the final entry and flicked backwards through the pages, crimson eyes roving, then fixed suddenly in place.

“ _Blackwood Company_ ,” he spat.

Out of the corner of his vision, he saw Evie nod her bowed head. Her body heaved with the hitching of her breath.

“...Bastards.”

Again, Evie nodded in agreement.

“How do I tell Vilena?” she asked quietly. “First Vitellus… now…”

She couldn’t say it. Modryn watched her with that same discomfort as she resumed sobbing openly, burying her face in her hands. He knew what he had to do. It was his head or hers, and Evie had become a good friend to him in the year or so since she’d entered his life. He already knew he wouldn’t ever do this for anyone else.

“Leave that to me.”

*

*

Evie was beginning to lose count of the number of times she and Modryn had camped out in a deserted Ayleid ruin together. And each time they did, it was no less difficult for her to get through the night, sleeping so close she could so easily reach out and touch him if she so happened to lose control of herself. More purpose in their mission than any that came before it, and vengeance heavy on their brains, and in their hearts, she hoped some of the tension she’d felt every time before might be lessened this time around.

Their journey had been delayed for about a week. Though Evie was certain the last of the Hist Sap had worked its way out of her system, Modryn refused to take any chances. She’d insisted she felt fine, and reminded him many times that every hour they remained in Chorrol might be spent in a far more sinister way by the Blackwood Company, but he’d maintained that her well-being was far more important to him. Evie chalked that up to guilt - after all, he’d been the one to send her on that mission.

On the second day of travel they settled a short way into the ruins of Bawn, entering when the sun was well into its descent behind the distant mountains, and the sky almost completely dark. Together they cleared the old ruin of whatever pests might prove a nuisance during their stay, and set up camp in a small room. Modryn lit a fire, and Evie cooked a simple meal. Tomorrow they’d arrive in Leyawiin, and they could have something a little more substantial when they arrived at their Guild. After that… they’d face the Blackwood Company for what they hoped would be the last time.

The underground room they camped out in was safe from the chilling wind outside, and the fire was comfortable - they both laid down their bed rolls a safe enough distance away, but still close enough for it to warm them. Modryn wasn’t cold, evidently, since he settled into his own bed roll wearing nothing above the waist. Evie longed to let her eyes wander his powerful body, to indulge that one sense while she had the chance… yet she still averted her gaze nervously. She was sure he’d notice if she ogled, and that would lead to a few questions she definitely didn’t want to answer.

So, heart pounding and stomach fluttering with excitement at the strange intimacy of the situation, Evie laid down in her own bed roll. She allowed herself one last glance at the perfect Dunmer sat next to her before closing her eyes - magelight hung in the air above him as he pored over Viranus Donton’s journal - how many times he’d done this since their comrade had been killed, she couldn’t be sure, but whenever they camped or rested on their journey to Leyawiin, Modryn seemed unable to put it down. Like it would offer some kind of closure, or help him make sense of it all.

Fire sprung to life and snuffed itself out repeatedly in his free hand, the thick smell of Magicka growing heavy and ebbing away each time. He’d been doing _that_ a lot on the journey, too. He was restless, that much was obvious. It seemed he couldn’t quite wait to destroy the tree.

“Is that Viranus’ journal again?” Evie asked, despite already knowing the answer.

Modryn ignored her, his eyes sweeping along the pages slowly. Surely he must be tired, Evie thought. _She_ certainly was.

It wouldn’t do him any good to stay up all night reading though. He’d need the energy tomorrow, he’d need to be alert. Those Blackwood Company bastards wouldn’t go down easy. “Put it down,” Evie said, as gently as possible. “You’ll need a decent night’s sleep for what’s to come. Surely you’ve read it enough times?”

Still, he said nothing, not even acknowledging that the Imperial had even spoken. Then suddenly, without looking away from the page, he spoke. “You knew… didn’t you?”

“Knew what?”

Modryn finally turned to look at her. “Viranus and Eduard.”

“Oh… yes, I knew. I don’t think he trusted a lot of people with that. I suppose there’s no harm in talking about it now…”

“You were good friends, weren’t you?”

“...Yes.”

Modryn finally put the journal down beside his bed roll. He snuffed out his magelight by reaching up and closing a hand around it, and suddenly the stone room was that much darker, only lit dimly by firelight. He shifted onto his side to fully face the girl, and she nearly groaned in longing as she looked at him. The bed roll pooled at his strong waist, every exposed, sculpted muscle on his body defined in light and shadow by the flickering fire.

Evie willed herself not to look down, to keep looking into his eyes instead of at his body… but his eyes were perfect too. Oh Nine… she wanted him. And she could never have him.

“Everyone thought you and he had something more than that,” he said. “Vilena did. _I_ did.”

Still lying down, Evie nodded her head. “Just because we weren’t together… doesn’t mean he was any less important to me. Doesn’t make it hurt any less.”

“I know.”

Modryn laid down too, hopefully for at least a few hours of good sleep. They faced each other as they both lay there, and now Evie was almost nauseated by the longing she felt. In the limited light the pupils of his crimson eyes were enormous, and she was hypnotised. She couldn’t look away. If only she could reach out and pull him close to her… feel his skin against her own… kiss him just the once…

She squeezed her eyes shut and rolled onto her back. If she was going to get through the night the very least she could do was _stop looking at him in that position_.

Already Evie could feel herself succumb to her exhaustion, the world around her becoming hazy, when Modryn’s voice brought her back to reality for just a moment.

“They’ll pay for what they’ve done, Evie. To Viranus… to the others… to you. I swear to Azura they’ll pay.”


	4. Had I Gone West

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set a few weeks after the events of _Insufferable_ , after everything has been made public.

Evie Cenitus bounded through the streets of Anvil, the picturesque buildings framed by the glare of the afternoon sunlight, and so many familiar surroundings, it all made her feel like she hadn’t a care in the world. Eventually she reached the doors of the Guild hall. When she pushed open the doors the cawing of seagulls both distant and near was dominated entirely by the thud of metal on wood and the clatter of heavy chains, and the grunts of three fighters relentlessly assaulting a large training dummy strung up in the middle of the foyer. She smiled as she watched them train, and after a short while she moved around them, unwilling to disturb them as she crossed the foyer and climbed the stairs.

While she certainly wasn’t opposed to staying a while in the beautiful city, and catching up with Azzan after these last couple of months was simply a must, business needn’t take too long. Her footfalls on the staircase were heavy as she practically jogged up but those of her comrade were heavier as he descended. They met halfway, and Evie’s face lit up at the sight of her friend.

“Azzan!” she greeted happily.

The Redguard, meanwhile, froze as though his guildmate had fired an arrow at him. “Evie…”

“I was just coming up to talk to you! Did you get my letter?”

Azzan managed to relax just a little, but still remained far too tense. “Yeah, yeah I got that.”

“Are you okay?”

“I’m fine, you just… I wasn’t expecting to see you so suddenly, you startled me, that’s all.”

He seemed more nervous than usual, and Evie didn’t have to think for a moment to know why that might be. Even she averted her gaze, the tension between them nearly tangible. All of a sudden, catching up later seemed like a more nerve-wracking prospect.

“I’ve come for business,” she continued, determined to make the encounter even a little less awkward than it was. “Maybe we can go somewhere else? The stairs aren’t such a good place to get that done.”

When she looked back up at him, the corners of Azzan’s mouth twitched into a small smile. “Of course. Let’s go to my office.”

Whatever he’d been heading downstairs for apparently could wait - the now-Champion turned back around and Evie followed him up to the office without any mention of it. As she entered, he held the door open, and closed it behind them when he followed her in. When they reached the desk he searched distractedly through a massive pile of papers.

“...Do you have the audit?” she asked nervously.

“It’s here _somewhere_ …” Azzan replied. He busied himself readily with the task of finding it - it gave him something to do. That being said, it was clear to Evie it might take him a long time - the desk was a mess.

“Let me help,” she said, “It looks like you could use a hand.”

Azzan didn’t protest, although Evie doubted it was just her imagination - the way he stiffened further when she moved around the desk and stood with him. She searched with determination, shoving papers old and new aside in the search for a specific document.

The Imperial laughed when she uncovered the previous quarter’s audit, and held the parchment up for her Guild brother to see. “This is from _last_ quarter!” she said, still grinning. “Why do you still _have_ this? Do we need to hire someone just to keep you organised?”

Azzan shrugged, his heavy steel armour moving only a little but enough for Evie to notice the gesture. He didn’t seem to find it as amusing as she did, so she moved on quickly, casting the old audit aside and piling more papers on top. Usually he was far more organised than this, and as the girl spotted her own handwriting, recognising the letter she’d sent announcing this very visit to his chapter, she knew he must have a lot on his mind.

“How’s everything in Chorrol?” he asked, not taking his attention away from his task as he spoke.

It was Evie’s turn to shrug non-committally while they worked. “As good as ever, I suppose. We had some trouble with a thief a couple of weeks ago but he didn’t take anything _too_ valuable. I don’t think he’ll ever be caught… but we’ll recover.”

Azzan was quiet for a moment. “I heard the news,” he said.

“What news?”

He stopped searching but still didn’t look at her. He forced himself to smile. “You and Modryn. I wish you both the best with it.”

“Oh… that news.” As if Evie hadn’t spent the whole encounter waiting on edge for that to come up. She stopped too. “Thanks, I appreciate it.”

She didn’t know what to say after that. The silence and tension between them was unbearable and she could feel her face burning hot. “To say I’m… happy would be an understatement. I’ve liked him for a long time.”

_You definitely shouldn’t have said_ that _, Evie._

“I know.”

Evie wanted nothing more than to sink into the floorboards and never be seen again. She sighed quietly. “That was… probably wrong of me to say. I’m sorry.”

Her friend’s feelings always came first. Whatever she said would probably be the wrong thing anyway. “…You’re… you’re okay, right?” she asked.

He didn’t answer right away. His dark gaze shifted up and he stared thoughtfully - presumably at the door, Evie couldn’t tell - and he thought about it for a moment. She couldn’t possibly imagine what he was thinking, he gave nothing away, nothing at all.

“I don’t know.”

She could feel herself trembling a little. This was a disaster. She’d dreaded this day ever since she and Modryn had announced their relationship publicly. “I- I don’t know what to say,” she babbled. “I want to make it- make you okay but things turned out how I wanted, please just tell-”

Suddenly a gentle hand was on her shoulder, warm and comforting even through the rough fabric of her tunic, and it silenced her words instantly. Finally, Azzan met her eyes.

“Evie, breathe,” he said simply. For the first time that day, his tiny smile was genuine. “I didn’t think you’d… _panic_ … like this. It’s okay, honestly.”

“You said you didn’t know if it _was_ okay…” Evie did what he asked and breathed a little slower. Things couldn’t get any worse than this, she might as well try and calm down. Internally she scorned herself for her moment of panic - how mad did she really think Azzan would be with her? He was one of her best friends, after all, and one of the kindest people she knew. “I value what you and I have, more than you know… so please tell me what I can do to make it right.”

Some part of her even expected Azzan to ask the obvious of her - because it was the obvious thing for someone in his position to want, she imagined. Were it the other way around, she’d certainly have been thinking it, and right now she wondered whether he did. Even if he _did_ … testament to him, he didn’t ask it.

The gentle hold on her shoulder loosened and his hand came away. The look on his face was heartbreaking to witness. “I just wanna know…” he began quietly, and then trailed off. “I just want to… know… if things could ever have been different. What I’m trying to say is… do you think there could’ve _ever_ been something?”

Evie’s dark eyebrows drew together just a little, and her right hand lifted onto the desk and settled on top of his left. “I think things could’ve turned out differently,” she said in affirmation. “I think… had I gone West out of the Imperial City, just out of chance, the same chance that took me to Chorrol… had I gone West instead, I’d have ended up in Anvil. I’d have asked around a little and found myself at the Guild, of course - fighting is all I’ve ever been taught to do after all. When I got there I’d have been greeted by a particularly handsome Redguard… and he’d have given me a _much_ warmer welcome into the ranks than the one I _actually_ had.”

Azzan smiled weakly as he listened to Evie’s story, knowing what she meant with that last remark, but his gaze still dropped to the ground.

“I think he and myself would’ve worked well together, of course, and we’d have become friends fast,” Evie continued. “Naturally that would’ve escalated into something more - if one of us so happened to make a move.”

The look in Azzan’s eyes was almost hopeful as he too imagined. “Oh yeah?”

Evie smiled widely. “Oh yeah. It would’ve been amazing. People would obviously question whether I should be involved with my superior but it wouldn’t change anything, would it? And they’d be unable to deny it, he and myself would be the best couple they’d ever seen.”

The more his younger comrade told him of this imagined world, the more his face lit up. He could get used to this world, perhaps.

“And _eventually_ , he’d have sent me off to Chorrol… to spend some time working on contracts there. The higher I climbed in rank, the more important it would be for me to meet the heads of the Guild all around Cyrodiil, of course. And there… I’d have met Modryn. And that would’ve been it. As long as I knew _him_ … I don’t think any other man could quite hold my interest.”

As the mood changed, the brightness in Azzan’s features also faded away and that impossibly glum look returned.

“I’d have gone back to Anvil and tried to keep on with my man as normal as possible but in the end it wouldn’t be right… to be with him when my heart belonged to someone else.”

His brown eyes met her blue. “I know,” he said.

“So to answer your question, I think… in _reality_ , we could’ve had fun along the way… even if my heart wasn’t in it. It’s not like I didn’t think about it often. You’re my friend, and… and I know you’d have been into it. But it wouldn’t have been fair, really… or would you rather I did that to you?”

“No... I’m glad you didn’t,” he answered straight away. “It would’ve been worse in the end.”

Evie only remembered her hand was still resting on top of his when he slid his out from underneath. Maybe it was her imagination, she thought- she _wished_ … that Azzan truly looked a little happier now. The Imperial straightened up, she was definitely shorter than Azzan but with him still bent over the desk she could easily place a gentle kiss on his forehead, and he let her.

“May nothing get in the way of what we have,” she said, almost whispering. “I hope it will be okay in the end.”

When Evie leaned away, the Redguard’s smile was genuine. “It will be. I just need time.”

“And you’ll have time.” When Evie turned back to the shrinking pile of papers, her gaze settled on a few words scrawled on a page near the top, and she slid the parchment out.

“This is it, right?” she asked, lowering the audit so her Guild brother could see.

He recognised it straight away. “That’s it, Evie. We can catch up properly later on… let’s get to work.”


End file.
